We parents must grasp this vital distinction. [“…It must be voluntary, however, to be courage.”] Forcing a kid to do the right thing is not the same as building courage in her, which in turn builds other qualities (like respect). In order for behavior to cultivate the young soil of courage in our children, it must be voluntary, not coercive. They must first want to do the right thing, then receive encouragement to stay upon this gallant course, which means helping them handle fear.
~Paul Coughlin in his blog
What I do:
I specialize in mentoring students who need to discover the positives of who they are in spite of challenges in school—by Giftedness, LD, ADHD, uniqueness, intelligence. Learning to develop their inner resources and outer support systems is vitally important to success in life, however one defines that. Kids that don’t fit into cookie cutter images due to gifts, talents, uniqueness and other challenges can have a hard time adapting to change and valuing themselves. Most kids when asked, “What good is there in ADD?” will reply, “Nothing”. Instead they are full of self-doubt, recrimination and negative self talk. They become beaten down by trying to fit in a restrictive paradigm. These kids, full of MANY wonderful qualities and talents, need a new viewpoint.
Our coaching relationship focuses on bring it all out in the open. We talk about what is really going on in their minds. Coaching kids has an element of guidance to it that is rarely present in adult coaching. I’ll present different options, ideas and viewpoints so that your child has an expanded awareness. When a student can articulate HOW they function best, they are again in control of their lives. This builds confidence and helps students take ACTION that allows them to be their true great selves.
I’m adamantly against environments, situations and learning institutions that result in a crushed spirit. A child is much too precious to allow that to happen. Most academic skills (not cognitive) can be learned anytime. Why crush a child’s spirit so that they learn the times tables? I just think that this is extremely counter-productive. We know too much about child development, how the brain learns best, accelerated learning techniques and motivation to think for one minute that “the old way” is ever worth the cost, long or short term.
Older teen and college student coaching is provided one-on-one and in small groups delivered by telephone. Kids’ coaching is very unique and play oriented. We provide this one-on-one and in small groups (3-6) in person, usually revolving around a specific theme for a number of sessions (8-10 weeks).
Parents who want support in “growing courageous kids” are welcome to enter the coaching partnership, also!