Growing Courageous Kids

(& Parents!)

Taking Courageous Action: getting unstuck (Part 2)

on March 7, 2009

Part Two

In Part One we looked at whether we were Big Beginners, Magnificent Middlers or Competent Completers. Click here to see which one you are.

As you looked at which type best fits your preferences and experience, you might notice that if you have a strong aversion to a particular stage of the process, a pattern of avoidance was set in place. Once this pattern becomes entrenched it’s very common for fear to kick in, so that next time we encounter the dreaded ending (beginning or middle) anxiety surfaces.

One of my friend’s suggests asking the following questions:

If I’m not beginning, following through, or finishing well…ask

  • What am I doing instead? (notice/observe)
  • What am I afraid of? (looking bad, messing up, not being perfect?)
  • If I were living in faith (or courage), would I choose to do this?

We have a couple of choices in taking courageous action. First, figure out why we have the fear/anxiety so we can be aware of our unconscious motivations. Examine our motivations with complete honesty. Are we actually sabotaging ourselves by settling for “I don’t want to.”? It’s important to explore these areas first before moving on to the next part.

Once you’re sure you’re not sabotaging yourself, holding yourself back in fear, or simply giving up to the deterministic idea of “I’m not good at that part, so why bother?” You’re ready for more courageous action. Be clear about your strengths and preferences and partner with people that complement you. If you’re a great beginner and finisher, have your partners be accountable for a magnificent middler. This is playing to your strengths is a key strategy for all successful and fulfilled people!

Let me know what your pattern is and how it’s working for you!

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